bollocks

What happened to the Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving?

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 18:15:00 +0000

I awoke this morning and lay in the dark as my wife slept next to me and gave this Thanksgiving thing a serious thought.
As I did not emigrate to the States until I was nineteen I do not have the childhood recollections of Thanksgiving traditions, just pictures of saw in magazines and the imprint on my mind of other traditions passed down from the families of my various wives.
The one I like the best and passed on to my children is the Macy parade early in the morning (yes I was up before anyone in my household - I have in-laws staying for the holiday - were even awake).
Anyway as I lay there in the dark I realized how thankful I am for my health and my family this year. A tear or two moistened my face as I thought of a couple of people. My second wife, Paula, and my friend Phil both back in Oklahoma, and coincidentally confined to the same nursing home. Paula is diabetic and both her parents dies some time ago. She was adopted and after her father passed ten years ago her two brothers, both older, snubbed her as the 'adopted sister' and allowed her to be sent to a State-run convalescent home for the rest of her life. Since the age of 43 she has had three strokes and a kidney transplant and when I saw her two weeks ago was swollen up from all the steroids in her system and is confined to a wheelchair. Phil, my old running buddy from back in the day is also in a wheelchair having been most recently bed-ridden for almost two years with a mystery ailment that has seen him drop over 60 lbs, to the point where his prosthesis (he has had a prosthetic leg and foot since his teens)falls off as his legs are so skinny. His family has abandoned him here too. Just what would they ever find to be thankful for today. In their place I don't think I could even be thankful for life. Their life is not one worth living, rotting away in a modern-day workhouse as if in some Dickensian novel.
I grew up in a family whose religious beliefs did not celebrate Christmas so I never experienced that family-around-the-dining-table style big get-together as you always see portrayed in holiday movies. I always yearned for the Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving celebration. You know the type, snow on the ground as the family pulls up to the house with the while picket fence as the mother in her apron pulls out a huge steaming-hot turkey and the father cheerfully slices off pieces of white breast for the grandparents and uncles and aunts while the tweens and kiddies sit at a separate table, toasts are drunk and football is playing on the TV in the next room.
Instead my first wife's family lived in rural Arkansas and we always drove to their little ram-shackle home to eat with hill-billies. The second wife's family. well these are the brothers that would not look after her when the parents died , so lets just say family gatherings where few and far between and markedly chilly when the did occur. The third wife was on the outs with her Dad and her Mum was dead.. in fact I recall doing the fixing myself as we had a baby just home from the hospital less than ten days from Thanksgiving and wife four's family were the epitome of dysfunctional.
Today I won't have my boys around me (I visited with them in Oklahoma a week or two ago) but I will sit and eat with my mother-in law and a brother-in-law and my wife. We will at some point be visited by the step-daughter and her boyfriend and our grandchild and we will enjoy turkey and football. We live in the Arizona desert and there is no snow and the homeowners association in our town homes would frown on a white picket fence but I can have one in my mind. So while I am sure there are a family or two out there who are sitting down to a traditional Norman Rockwell-type dinner most of us will have to just enjoy what we have made for ourselves and you know what, that is enough. I have the picture in my mind of what I think it should be but America's melded family unit has changed over the years, and so have our ideals of the Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving, so lets be thankful for what we have.

The Rat

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Sat, 17 Oct 2009 19:22:00 +0000

I didn’t set out to be a rat; it just turned out that way.

They came at midnight. A chief inspector and six constables. Thumping on the door. Hard. My father stumbled down the stairs in his slippers and striped pajamas, pulling a robe around him as he came. Bleary-eyed he opened the door. When he saw the flashing red and blue lights his first thought had to be ‘what have I done’?

“We’ve had a report that Mark’s been badly beaten.”

Belting his robe my father allowed himself to be led to the back seat of one of the patrol cars and to be driven the five hundred yards around the corner to the Gnosall Police department. Here they find me bent over the bleeding body of young Mark, a local teen. As he emerged from the patrol car I saw Dad. Confusion and relief were all over his face.

I’d met Mark, or Sharkey, as the locals called him, when his mother, a co-worker at the government offices in Stafford, gave me a ride home one evening. When he had introduced himself by his nick-name I didn’t have to ask. The proportion of his curved proboscis as it extended from the middle of his face was enough. As for the shaved head, leather jacket, jeans with a wide cuff and ‘bovver’ boots, well they all spoke of his character. Over the next several months we exchanged nods as we passed on the street or in the pub. A casual acquaintance; no more.

I was a short-timer at this point. My parents had moved our family from the home I had known since I was three, to another in neighboring Gnosall. Small village to small village. This would never be my home. I had been accepted to university in America and was just biding my time, working over the summer to have a little spending money for when I moved to Texas.

I had been a well behaved child, not involved with the kind of trouble that would require the intervention of law enforcement. Whenever I thought of the police, which to be honest wasn’t often, I often recalled the rhyme my Mother recited to as me as a youngster. “If you want to know the time, ask a policeman.” It left a prevailing image of the typical British bobby; helpful, kind and respected.

After the policeman had called an ambulance and Sharkey was whisked away to hospital the questioning began in earnest. Yes I am a witness and yes I did recognize one of the assailants; Chris, long blonde hair, about nineteen I’d guess, football player. In fact we’d had a game tonight and we all just caught the bus home together. The assault happened as they exited the bus and I had been the one that had called nine one one.

When they knocked on his front door another father was met by flashing lights. Chris stood there with him, swathed in the light from the porch light. The constable handling the questioning turned his flashlight on me, sitting trembling in the cold in the back of the police car, illuminated my tired pale face and asked Chris if he recognized me. And so the rat was born, and my opinion of the boys in blue became a little fuzzy in the helpful, kind and respected department.

Luckily this story does have a happy ending, for this Mark anyway. After a couple of close calls, occasionally walking home the seven miles because Chris and his friends where again riding the last bus home, I managed to ensure I was never dealt a similar fate as Sharkey. This rat left town in one piece never to return.

Embarrased in Tucson

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 22:19:00 +0000

One evening last week as I wrapped up my evenings bill paying on the computer I noticed that I had a new message on Facebook.

When I clicked on the link I was pleasantly surprised to find a note from my college roommate. He was in town, remembered I lived in Tucson, and had been stood up on his business dinner and wondered if I was free to join him. He went on to say he was working in his room until seven and then planned to eat dinner in the restaurant at the hotel where he was staying The Hotel Arizona. I say I was surprised, as other than an occasional e-mail with his wife, who runs a college alumni website, I had not seen or spoken to him since our college days in 1976. Nevertheless I was pleased to join him as we had always gotten as roommates.

Hurriedly rushing downtown I found him munching on a burger and beer in the Saguaro Lounge, over looking the hotels spacious polished marble lobby. I was impressed with the area having not had the opportunity to visit since the new owners opened the place. Funny how first impressions can be wrong.

It was good to see my friend. He looked about the same as I recalled only thirty years older, and we sat and had a pleasant conversation. When the bartender approached us I asked for coffee – they had none. A bar and restaurant with no coffee? I finally had to suggest he trot off to the employee lounge, where they undoubtedly had coffee, to fetch me a cup. One was produced from somewhere and all seemed well.

Mt friend explained that he is an event planner with a large organization and was in town scoping out the facilities near the convention center, the Hotel Arizona is adjacent to the Tucson Convention Center, however he seemed a little nonplussed with the hotel to this point. As we were speaking the large burly bartender headed over again and asked if we needed anything else. We decided to try the cheesecake. Then we were informed the restaurant had already closed so it was not available. It was at this time only eight o’clock and the hotel advertised the restaurant, The Coyote Café and Bistro, was open until nine. We could not understand why we had not been given the courtesy of at least a ‘last call’… and I still can’t comprehend why even if it was closed, that the barman could not have lifted the lid of the cheesecake container and slid out two pieces of pie. It was not as if the place was crawling with people wanting to eat. The only other occupants of the bar seemed more intent on watching television or drinking beer.

Talking of the ‘other occupants’. In the main lobby a group gathered learning to dance the Flamenco from some gringo that claimed had, we could hear over our conversation and the baseball game on the flat screen TV (By the way this is billed on the hotel website as a “…big screen television to add to the enchanting experience of fine dining…”. Oh really.. beer & a burger in a bar is fine dining - not even in Tucson thank you very much), lived in Argentina at one time. As distracting as they were they had nothing on the ‘working girl’ that was apparently trolling the lobby. In stilettos taller than her skirt was long she approached several gentlemen trying to get a cigarette lit. Seeing as how smoking in public buildings in Tucson is against the law, this was apparently a secret code for “step outside with me I have a van.” One gentleman lit her cigarette and they came back in to the lobby after about twenty minutes. She evidently was a chain smoker as she continued to attempt to get a light.

My dining, well drinking companion actually, went on to explain how the phones in his suite did not work. He had phoned the lobby with his cellular phone to get them to come up and fix the phones in the room. No manager was on duty, the grey-clad, key bearing maintenance man seemed to be in charge. Also the suite had no iron or ironing board (even thought again the website clearly states it has one in each room), and the “complimentary high speed wireless internet” apparently worked in the room but left a little to be desired in the bar/lobby area unless you were standing on one leg, facing north, with your baseball cap on backwards.. well, you get the idea.

I was embarrassed for him and for Tucson. As for whether the hotel is a site for conventioneers to stay well I don’t’ have to make that decision, my friend does.

'Dithering Dave" Moyes

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 14:05:00 +0000

It always drives me crazy... especially as an Everton Fan. Not only do we have 'dithering Dave' as a manager, who every season seems to wait until the last moment to buy his players, as he watches what we have been told by the media are supposedly prime targets get sold to Manchester United or worse Liverpool, but then half the teams want our star players. So we are torn do we sell Lescott and Cahill? As a supporter it is clear .. hell no! As a business manager it has to be looked at as fifteen million pounds profit per player if we let them go for twenty million a piece. That would give us a tidy profit and loosen up some funds for the players we do want to bring in.
As for Everton I must say Moyes has bought in some talented players from the lower leagues, Spanish cast-offs etc and made a cohesive unit that if we can stay fit will challenge in Europe and for silverware in England again this year. Wish we just had a fairy godmother to wave a wand and buy us the 3-4 players who would make a difference.
So who goes and who stays.. it's always a jigsaw puzzle with a missing piece in frustration levels to me. Stay on top of the action at The Transfer Tavern and watch this space for more ruminations on who goes where as I get my blog bitching going for the new Season. Catch me on Facebook as I pull a Luke Garbutt (actually I correspond regularly on Facebook with several junior members of Everton's 'young lions' and you can too if you check my page out. I want to add a congratulations to Anthony Gerrard, a former youth player at Everton, who has just made the transfer from Walsall to Cardiff to secure a Championship position for this season.
By the way Only 15 days to the first pre-season game for Everton, and then they come to visit America. I had hoped to be able to visit Utah to see the game against the MLS Allstars but looks like I'll have to watch in on the boob-tube after all.

Soccerpro.com 2009 review

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 01:48:00 +0000

My friends at Soccerpro.com contacted me a few weeks back and asked if I would be interested in trying some of the gear out as I did last year and letting my readers know about them and their products here in Bollocks. Of course I was delighted to oblige and swiftly went through their online catalog and chose a couple of items as you will see below.

I should preface my comments by mentioning a couple of things. I was recently diagnosed with a bulging disk in my lower back so I have perhaps not had the opportunity to put these items through an intense training schedule, however I believe I have used them a least as hard as any member of the general public would, outside of actually playing a soccer game in the clothes. The doctor did release me for training activities last week so I hope this is sufficient as to give you a good idea of these particular items. Secondly it has been 95 degrees in Tucson this week so I have had to train indoors more than out, so that should give you a different perspective to consider.

The first item I chose was a short-sleeved T-shirt. You can view it at this link, so as you can see it is manufactured by Nike,is colored navy and is emblazoned with the words "Property of U.S. Soccer Federation, EST. 1913" in red.
I really liked this product for a number of reasons. It has no annoying tag in the back, the Nike emblem is printed on the shirt. It is 100% cotton, but has the wicking quality that many work out shirts do these days, and neck is wide and stretches without losing its shape. I took a four-mile hike up Sabino Canyon over the weekend in 90 degree temperatures and worked up a good sweat (actually since this was my first distance hike since my injury I turned around just a little before the two mile-marker, so in actual fact the shirt did better than I. I was comfortable and relatively dry and cool, the shirt did not soak up sweat like cotton shirts normally do. I also wore it work on Casual-Friday ab d it solicited a couple of comments as to being a good-looking shirt.

The second item is a training suit from the LA Galaxy. I was surprised by how heavy the material was, but impressed with the flash colorful yellow and blue. The jacket is nice enough to wear as a jacket with jeans with a nice t-shirt (or at least would be somewhere other than Arizona); perhaps the temperature might be cold enough for a couple of weeks in February! I don't know if it's ever cold enough in California for this outfit to train in, perhaps more suited to the mid-west or back East. I tried on the pants and have to say if you have nice long muscular legs - like my wife who immediately stole them from me saying they would suit her me then me - (I did nick them back when she left the house) - but if you have calves like grapefruit from years of long distance running as I do, then they clip a little uncomfortably around the lower leg. Their is an option to pull open the zipper to mid-calf, however that looks kind of dorky when running or cycling, however the zipper does allow enough room to take the pants on and off with out removing your training shoes if you are so inclined. Adidas does have the tag in the back but it did not seem to itch or bother me at all. The material is 100% polyester, and it has two zippered side pockets voluminous to lose your car keys in.

The top also is equipped with two zippered side pockets and two inner open pockets. It was in these inner pockets that I sequestered my car keys when I went down to the gym and rode the stationary bike for an hour - long enough to work up a slight sheen of sweat, probably because I was wearing the trainer! Somewhere over Random Hills however in this recumbent seating the keys fell out, so use the zippered pockets or spend an hour or so walking back and forth over the soccer filed mumbling cuss words as you try to find your missing car keys.

I wore the outfit to work today as it was casual Friday and the bright yellow top raised some eyebrows from a couple of the more conservative types (including my boss!) but I loved it. The top all though being long sleeved is fashioned, at least length-wise, like a bowling shirt. The only problem I encountered was that, along with the draw-string that tightens the pants, the length made standing at the urinal a little inconvenient!

As it turns out SoccerPro.com is getting serious about Facebook and Twitter and are
spending a lot more resources trying to get people informed. Check out their
Facebook page here which has various contests on a continual basis.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/SoccerProcom/28805721020

http://www.twitter.com/SoccerPro

Everton and the 2009 FA Cup

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Mon, 01 Jun 2009 02:44:00 +0000

It was 5 am when I stirred feverishly in the confines of my king-sized bed. As usual the wife had managed to pull the blankets around just her so I was laying curled up in a ball, feeling the breeze from the fan making the hair on my legs move as he blades swung. Not cold mind you this is Arizona in May and the temperature outside was probably already 75 degrees.
I pulled my self up into a sitting position and hacked up a loogie; sinus problems in a dry heat make one sound like Tony Randall in the Odd Couple every morning. I yawned and stretched. Looking over my shoulder I debated on whether to wake the missus for a little pre-game celebration but decided naw.. let her sleep. She is not a soccer (football for the purists) fan at all.
I got up bent over and fished my blue t-shirt out of the bottom draw. Has the name Ball and 8 on the back in white. Stumbling out to the kitchen I went through the motions of making coffee and then headed back to my office to pull up Facebook and have a natter with my nephew Michael at Uni in Sheffield. He had played on Man U's youth squad at one time and I caught him getting ready to head off down the pub to watch the game on the telly. 2-0 to Chelsea he predicts 2-1 Everton in OT say I.. good luck and he's off.
I went out and switched on the telly so I could here the US commentators drone on about the up coping game, and grabbed a mug off coffee heading back to the computer to read what the Beeb had to say on it's pre-game notes. Everyone seems to agree that Everton is the under-dog and stands no chance; would be out-classed by Chelsea's wonder-men. Typical; no respect. Look who we knocked-off to earn the right to be in this game for the first time in 13 years, Man U, Aston Villa, Liverpool, all teams higher than us in the premier league at the time we faced them. We have a chance I told myself.
7 am and kick off. Thank God I had taken a mug of coffee with me to the sofa instead of getting one in the opening seconds 'cos Saha pops up and scores the fastest goal in FA Cup history. Just like that 28 seconds, he lashes on to Fellani's header and Chelsea are a heavy-weight on the ropes. The noise in Wembley Stadium was so overpowering that I could not hear the commentators clearly for a good five minutes. Othe r than jubilation the only thought I had was it's too early. What a terrible time to score. How the hell are we going to hold them for 90 minutes? If had been the 45 minute I would have been happier.. and then of course 20 minutes later Drogba gets on the end of a cross that Hibbert did not get at fast enough and it was all even.
The resat is history, Lampard pulled out a typical 20 yard screamer and that was all she wrote. My biggest disappointment, other than the actual score line was the way Everton's midfield men disappeared. The must have just wilted in the almost 100 degree heat that London was blessed with that day. Osman and Pienaar were not effective, Hibbert was replaced at the break by Jacobsen, more for his sin of not getting at Malouda faster than anything else, but for the rest of the lads well done. It just wasn't to be but look how far we have come.
Next year we will challenge again, and a top four league spot is open for us to take. Watch Moyes buy us a couple of replacements, get the squad fit and were ready to push Arsenal out of the way next year!

Bollocks' EPL season reviewed club by club

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Mon, 25 May 2009 14:31:00 +0000

How they did this year: Manchester United. League Champs

Over-rated: Rooney, sorry I’m an Everton supporter and cannot ever say anything nice here – he can do more than he does.

Under-rated: Foster; Fletcher

Best Transfer: Berbatov

Best Youth: Macheda

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Neville, just needs to retire, faithful old injured servant.

What must they do to be successful next year: Same song, second verse. Need to continue to replace aging players, or under-performing ones.

How they did this year: Liverpool 2nd and should have done better.

Over-rated: Mascherano

Under-rated: Benayoun

Best Transfer: Kuyt

Best Youth: Babel

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: N’gog

What must they do to be successful next year: Stop the manager fron scrapping with the owners, who need to settle rumours of their financial problems so the team can settle down, and for goodness sake find Torres a better strike partner.

How they did this year: Chelsea 3rd and FA cup finalists

Over-rated: Ballack

Under-rated: Malouda

Best Transfer: Anelka

Best Youth: Mancienne

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Chelsea have a habit of waiving defenders one they get a little long in the tooth so while Ashley Cole still has many years to play in the Prem perhaps he is no longer good enough to fir in a top-four team

What must they do to be successful next year: Find a way to get Anelka and Drogba on the field at the same time. Perhaps a new manager, as one is expected, will bring some new tactics to let this star-studded team flow a little better.

How they did this year: Arsenal 4th. They survived a period at the end of the year of losing, but knowing that neither r team below them could catch them in points, but that they could not catch the top three teams either. Fourth is not bad.

Over-rated: Amunia

Under-rated: Van Persie

Best Transfer: Arshavin

Best Youth: Walcott

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Gallas, past his prime and too temperamental to be captain. Perhaps an up and-comer in the Championship might desire his knowledge like WBA

What must they do to be successful next year: I don’t believe they will challenge for anything more than a top ten spot in the league next year. There is a growth period coming, a lack of money to buy new and talk of Adebayor moving to Chelsea. This hard working dedicated group, susceptible to injury this past year will struggle a little, especially trying to keep up with Europe, and if they fall outside of the Big Four may just lose their manager too.

How they did this year: Everton 5th and FA cup finalists.

Over-rated: Yobo

Under-rated: Osman

Best Transfer: Fellaini

Best Youth: Rodman

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Van der Meyde; Valente

What must they do to be successful next year: Stay healthier longer. Last two seasons have seen an interruption of flow due to injuries and the squad is too small to support that type of loss. For the last half of the season midfielders have been masquerading as strikers, reasonably successfully, so perhaps a top 4 position would have been in their grasp if the squad was stronger. Would like to see them bring in a sturdy midfielder like Huddleston from Spurs.

How they did this year: Aston Villa 6th. Switched off one too many times. Needs a little more consistency. Qualified for the Europa League.

Over-rated: Harewood

Under-rated: Barry

Best Transfer: Milner, L. Young

Best Youth: Albrighton

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Guzman should leave to gain experience. He is doing his international status no good on the bench. There are plenty of Championship teams he can earn a living at.

What must they do to be successful next year: Keep Heskey healthy. He is worth a ton of goals. Will really miss Laurensen as captain as he is retiring. They need to find a strong leader for the back line. Perhaps Micah Richards would flourish under O’Neills tutelage, though the manager has his eyes on Lescott. I expect them to be challenging for Europe again 2010.

How they did this year: Fulham 7th Qualified for the Europa League

Over-rated: Konchesky

Under-rated: Murphy

Best Transfer: Schwarzer

Best Youth: Omozusi

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Gera

What must they do to be successful next year: They took a run of luck in the Europa league to give their players some experience because the team is not strong enough, even with as wily a fox as Hodgson is as a manager, to compete for the top four in the Prem. Top ten next year is a possibility.

How they did this year: Tottenham 8th. Had a strong finish under difficult circumstances that had found them in the bottom five at one time.

Over-rated: Woodgate

Under-rated: Modric

Best Transfer: Keane

Best Youth: Huddlestone

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Gomes; Pavlyuchenko

What must they do to be successful next year: On paper they challenge for top 7 status next year. Redknapp taking over as manager gives them the edge they were looking for, and perhaps strengthening the defense as King and Woodgate ain’t going to be strong enough next year.

How they did this year: West Ham 9th. Over-achieved

Over-rated: Green

Under-rated: Noble

Best Transfer: Tristan

Best Youth: Sears

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Bowyer

What must they do to be successful next year: Even with Zola in charge I see this team struggling to get in the top ten. Financially they will struggle and the helpers they bought in to shore up a weakened side are slow and a year older. It will be 3-5 years before this team is able to break in to the top part of the table again.

How they did this year: Manchester City 10th but they under performed and should have been challenging the top six.

Over-rated: Benjani

Under-rated: Ireland

Best Transfer: Jo, and they loaned him out!

Best Youth: Richards

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Vassell; Dunne; Mills: Haman

What must they do to be successful next year: Find a way to make this group of super-stars gel and get into the top six. Out of the also-rans out there they, on paper, stand the best chance. A slow start will see Hughes will get his marching orders. They need to trash their entire defense except for Bridge. Sell Richards to Arsenal for some super tutelage and get him back in the England fold. Dunne is done, Mills too... too old for the Prem. Strengthening the defense will give the elite strikers a chance to work better.

How they did this year: Wigan 11th. How often can Bruce pull a miracle out of the hat?

Over-rated: Bramble

Under-rated: Kirkland

Best Transfer: Cattermole

Best Youth: Watson

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Koumas; Cho; Zaki

What must they do to be successful next year: Find momentum and consistency. Manager Steve Bruce seems to always find a way to shuffle players and survive, and that is all they will do next year unless they can bring in a proven striker and get a good start to the season. Sorry Wigan I peg you for bottom five next season.

How they did this year: Stoke, 12th survived their first year back with a mid-table showing and that is commendable. They have a strong manager in Pulis and until they bought in Beattie one of the tallest squads in the Prem on average.

Over-rated: Olofinjana

Under-rated: Etherington

Best Transfer: Beattie

Best Youth: Pugh

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Tonge, needs to go back to the Championship

What must they do to be successful next year: Find away to win six more games and challenge for a mid-table spot. With rivals from the Midlands, Birmingham City and Wolverhampton Wanderers in the Prem next year they could get overshadowed.

How they did this year: Bolton 13th. Always a hard team to beat at home they felt a little short of their toughman image the last few games of the season and it probably lost them the top ten berth I thought they deserved.

Over-rated: Muamba

Under-rated: Cahill

Best Transfer: Habsi

Best Youth: Obadeyi

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Samuel, McCann

What must they do to be successful next year: Find a proven goal scorer to take the target off of Davies' back.

How they did this year: Portsmouth 14th. Tough year with survival down to the last few weeks.

Over-rated: Campbell

Under-rated: Pennant

Best Transfer: Pennant

Best Youth: Kilbey

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Nugent; Kanu

What must they do to be successful next year: With James injured and aging, a strong reserve ‘keeper is needed, perhaps Hart from Man City as an under-study and replacement. Most of the defense is aging and a stronger youth/reserve team is needed to draw from if they hope to stay in the Prem next year.

How they did this year: Blackburn 15th. It would have been worse if Ince had stayed as manager. He just didn’t mesh with this team (though I think he will succeed at the right team eventually). Bringing in Allardyce helped them stabilize as he is great and bringing out the best in mediocre players.

Over-rated: Roberts

Under-rated: Nelson

Best Transfer: Robinson

Best Youth: Doran

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Tugay Kerimoglu

What must they do to be successful next year: This squad will never be more than a middle of the road, bordering on top-ten status, unless Allardyce can pull off a miracle. McCarthy is getting a little long in the tooth, and their hard-working defense needs to be shored up. Bringing back Derbyshire from on-loan at Olympk will provide some needed speed to the midfield.

How they did this year: Sunderland 16th. They were lucky to hang up through the final couple of games

Over-rated: Jones

Under-rated: Malbranque

Best Transfer: Ferdinand

Best Youth: Waghorn

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Diouf; Yorke

What must they do to be successful next year: Get a strong manager and then find a strike force, Cisse was on loan but never was the leader they needed up front. Bottom five again next year

How they did this year: Hull 17th Needed final day failures from other teams to survive. Their fast start to the season paid off in the long run

Over-rated: Boateng

Under-rated: Zayette

Best Transfer: Bullard

Best Youth: Cooper

Player that can no longer hack playing in the Premiership: Barmby; Kilbane; Windass

What must they do to be successful next year: They can’t. Will always be a perennial bottom 5 club.

Newcastle: 18th The club needs to re-gain it's pride, get a strong youth team, hang on to the core group of players, and buy well with the talent they have to off load. They will be back next season.

Middlesbourgh: 19th It will be a long time before we see them in the top strata of football again.

West Brom: 20th. Weak. Goodbye.

Everton in the FA Cup Final

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Thu, 14 May 2009 01:32:00 +0000

I have not written much about Everton's current success, approaching fifth in the EPL and booking a trip to the F.A. Cup finals at Wembly stadium to play the team currently sitting three places above them in the league, Chelsea. Just two weeks to June 30. Cant wait!

Not to worry. To get there we knocked off teams sitting in the first, second and fifth place, so while it will be no walk in the park I'm not stressing. We are after all the mighty Blues and we will be playing in our first team uniform while Chelsea will have to play in an all yellow strip. if you are superstitious then we have the upper hand before the whistle even blows. My prediction? 2-1 in overtime.

It has been hard to keep up with soccer because my precious spare time has been concentrating on getting my debut novel, Blood on His Hands out in print. Finally, on that day of infamy, May 8, 2009, Infinity Publishing announced the book available on their site.

My website describes the novel thus, "Blood on His Hands is one man's tale of the inner struggles that we all deal with in our lives. Mike Renton struggles between doing the right thing or doing that which will benefit himself; taking the road to righteousness or the one the one leads to deceit.
His life seems to end the moment he pulled the trigger sending his unfaithful wife and her lover into oblivion.
On the lam, his journey takes him from rural Oklahoma to the glitz of Las Vegas. He had not however, anticipated the determined tenacity of private investigator Ian Walker, who tracks him down to northern Georgia on to the Appalachian Trail just outside of the sleepy hamlet of Helen. Was the path chosen by both men the trail to redemption, forgiveness and repentance, or was it one that will eventually pull them into tempest and despair; a black hole into oblivion?
Nine months later, in the spring of the following year human remains are discovered by a hiker just off the Appalachian Trail. How will the decisions made by the White County coroner’s office affect the final outcome of the journey Mike Renton started when he killed his wife and will he be able to deal with the repercussions that come along with the choices he made? Blood on His Hands leads us from wanton despair to the promise of a new life no matter the cost."

I spent a considerable amount of time traipsing over the Appalachian Trail (see prior postings from the birth of this blog)and felt compelled to share with the world some of the experiences I went through to get to the end of my journey. Because so many greats have gone before me, men like Bill Bryson, David Miller, or Rick McKinney, and written their AT journey I decided rather than jostle for my place in a crowded field at Trail Days I wrote the next great American novel instead.
Loosely based on experiences I had fun for about three years patching the story together, drawing on many past experiences, to complete what I hope you will all buy. As of today it is only available at my publishers site; it takes Amazon 2-3 three months to get a self-published novel available and Barnes & Nobles almost a year, so to help establish me as a top-selling author you will need to fork out your $14,95 and buy it on line today via Infinity Publishing. This also means that it is only available to audiences in America for now. I will write again and advice you all when it comes out to all the international audience.

Totally off the subject, I have once again been asked my the good folks at SoccerPro.com to take their product and test it out and write about it here on my blog as a separate feature, so watch out for the review here shortly.

Blood on His Hands

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 18:07:00 +0000

I have finally seen my book in print. You can check it out at my website as I am reviewing and making the final edits in the initial proof. In fact I actually finished those up and e-mailed the (hopefully) totally edited proof back for publication. I believe they make the changes and send me back on final review copy after which we should be in print and ready to be purchased within 2-4 weeks. I cannot express how exciting, and nerve-wracking it is to be this close to completion.
This is the culmination of three years worth of work and I am very happy with the way it has turned out. I want to throw out a few kudos to people that have helped me along the way. if you read this you know who you are and without you I would never have gotten to where I am today, in a fictional sense anyway,
My wife, Louisa, for giving up precious time with me while I pounded away with two fingers on the keyboard at odd hours and swore at my Dell for behaving so badly.
Timur Tau who gave me a few moments in the busy gun shop to show me how a Remington 1100 actually works.
David 'AWOL' Miller the author of one of the finest Appalachian Trail books I have read, AWOL on The Trail. He has become a fine friend and confidant in the world of writing, and kindly allowed me to e-mail and call him with questions. He also is one of the fine folks that I have been able to ask to read an advanced reader copy (ARC) of Blood on His Hands and write a review.
Steve Minton, a fine mind and writing talent that inspired and encouraged me and also agreed to be a contributor by reading an ARC.
Bill Sartor; a Tucson based private investigator who without whose help I would never have completed the adventure seven years ago that led to Blood on His Hands being written. Bill, you know what you did. Thank you my friend.
My son, Brian, who gave me the "insider" tips on the oil rig scenes and who the physical description of the protagonist is based upon.
Carolyn Harvey, the best friend in the world, whose help in keeping me alive at the darkest days of my life I can never repay.
Karen Langesan and Mike McDonald for a peek at life in New Zealand so that I could write my villain in a authentic fashion.
Kay Mathena who heads up the Chamber of Commerce in Helen, GA where the body was found close to Unicoi Gap on the Appalachian Trail.
Joe Gold another Tucson author, now based in san Francisco, who allowed me to hang out and pick his literal brain, and who also is one of my ARC readers.
Katie Frazee, who filled me in on "maggot maturation" and other forensic tips.
Jana Bauer whose invaluable help in the editing process is deeply appreciated (I made the rookie error of thinking I could self-edit. Jana found well over 200 grammatical errors that I missed. Next time I will hire a professional editor and not try to scrimp on the cost). A valuable lesson learned, luckily, not too late.
Last but not least, a young lady that if anyone knows where she is please have her contact me, Tyga Hunter, who was there with sage advice out on the AT where we shared time at the hostel at Neels Gap.
I need to also mention the artistic talents of Matthias Plunkett, who is responsible for the design work on the cover of the book, James Harris my web designer and Karl Koffman whose work you can see below in the form of the YouTube video promo he put together to promote Blood on His Hands.

Nail biting moments

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Sun, 08 Mar 2009 19:53:00 +0000

I am a bit of a control freak - some say anally so- but I like to have a hand in what's going on, or at least a say in the matter.

Recently I have had to stand on the side lines and watch as matters kind of take things in to their own hands. Drives me nuts! But what am I going to do; ain't nothing to do but stand watch and wait.

Just sat watching Everton come back from behind to beat Middlesboro 2-1 in the quarter finals on the F.A. Cup. They kept giving me nail biting moments especial when Howard spilled the ball with two minutes to go.

Then sitting waiting for the draw, hoping against hope its any team but Manchester United. its Manchester United! We just going to have to get to the final in the hardest fashion possible but after beating Liverpool and Aston Villa on the way there guess I'll get through this nail biting moment too.

Then there's the visit from the maternal parent and her husband. The wife's going nuts over doing the spring cleaning. I keep telling her their old, they cant see the dirt anymore .. but she can't chill.. so here goes another nail biting moment... what type of muesli to buy them. I don't know I've not lived at home for over thirty years. Check out Sprouts.. so many types, none that appeal to me so hey here's an idea take them shopping to pick their own when they arrive.

But the biggest nail biter of all.. finally a print on demand publisher, Infinity Publishing, has taken Blood on His Hands and it is in the publishing stages as I write this. This means handing over my three year old project for someone else to handle. They said five to seven weeks to get the first proofs (that was March 3 but hey whose counting)so they should arrive any day now. Once I approve them and send them back another 2-4 weeks and you can buy my book on line.

I hate having no control, but life goes abut it's own pace whether I like it or not!

Life just threw Everton a lifeline

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Sun, 15 Feb 2009 18:31:00 +0000

Under the current leadership of David Moyes Everton have risen to the occasion to go as high as they can in the EPL, not quite cracking that top four, Man Utd, Liverpool, Chelsea or Arsenal, but enough to get us into Europe on a couple of occasions, more than can be said by at least a dozen other Premier teams that flounder between mid-table and the the dreaded relegation zone year in year out.

They are still chipping away as the gloss is peeling from the form of the top four, Arsenal finds themselves on the outside looking in as Aston Villa have managed to force their way for now into the upper tier, Chelsea fired their manager and Everton stand strong in sixth place ready for a slip up from anyone above them, knowing their closest opponent below, Wigan, has to win two to catch them and their next game is Chelsea. While not in a position to relax Everton can feel the hand of God touching their shoulders as their next opponents are Newcastle (reeling after their stand in boss has heart surgery), West Brom (bottom of the table), Blackburn (also in relegation zone), Stoke (a struggling newcomer to the EPL), who along with Portsmouth are all in the bottom six. It is not until the first week of April do the Toffees find a tougher opponent and that being Wigan, if they are still hanging in there in a month. Just stay focused and hope someone above stumbles.

That being said the one competition that has flummoxed Everton over recent years is the F.A. Cup, the goal of all teams in the nation to show case the best to win the biggest prize of all. For the last several seasons Everton has been at the mercy of giant killers as they have been knocked out of this tournament by up and coming lower league opponents. This year has been tough too. We drew Liverpool, the number one team in the country (Aye it is hard and humbling to even type that phase) but we held them to a draw and in the reply too overtime when young Everton lion, Dan Gosling, put away a shot for the ages and won it for Everton moments before penalties would have been shot. Our reward, facing the number three team in the country, Aston Villa. The Villains had scored a last second goal of their own to beat Everton at Goodison Park earlier in the season. Today they went down to a spirited Everton 3-1.

What will be the reward this time around. Will it be Manchester United, Chelsea, or will be catch a break and get an easy opponent.. it's just moments way now. I write this as the draw is being made.. and it's West Ham or Middlesbrough (they played to a tie and are replaying soon)and at home.

The Blues are in the final eight, at home and to a team we can beat.. life just threw Everton a lifeline. Chelsea, Arsenal and Man Utd are all alive too having managed to escape playing each other in this round, here is the draw courtesy of the BBC:

Blackburn Rovers or Coventry City v Chelsea

Swansea City or Fulham v Manchester United

Cardiff City or Arsenal v Sheffield United or Hull City

Everton v West Ham United or Middlesbrough

Looks like the quarter finals should be four teams from the top six in the Premier. Everton already beat the other two.. bring it on!

Pissing Off The Football Gods

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 06:05:00 +0000

After seeing the draw for the upcoming round of the F.A. Cup I e-mailed a mate of mine, an Ipswich Town supporter, and suggested that perhaps our respective teams had pissed off the football gods in some fashion. His facetious response that he thought an away game against The Shrimpers wasn't that bad a draw.

You see Ipswich has drawn the winner of the Chelsea v. Southend replay (let's face it they mighty Shrimpers may have battled back once to earn a 1-1 tie but their chances of beating Chelsea at Stamford Bridge is negligible) and Everton have drawn their arch rivals and current number one team in the country, Liverpool, at Anfield. The last time Everton met Liverpool in the F.A. Cup was in 1990-91 when it took three games for the outcome to be decided. We shared the first Anfield tie 0-0,, a 4-4 tie in the second game before finally beating them on the third attempt. As nerve wracking as this is for the fans I'd be happy to win the first time around this year. Fingers crossed!

While I would love to say they are their equal, this tie has disaster written all over it. The team are lucky to find themselves holding on to sixth place in the Premier League. Liverpool are current champions and well Everton don't have a healthy striker, the amazing Tim Cahill, is standing in valiantly while the injury stricken frontline watches from the training room. Not only that but the two teams actually play the week before the F.A. Cup fixture just the week before in a regular league game, also at the Reds home field. Everton has had the misfortune of being dismissed from the the tournament by a succession of "giant-killers" over the last few years so a defeat by the Reds would not be such a disaster, however a win would definitely hand them back some much needed respect.

Trying to find some positive for Everton is that The Red Shite's captain, Steve Gerrard, is facing charges bought about by his alleged involvement in a brawl last week, and maybe is a little unsettled. We can only hope. Everton's away form this year is much better than our home form so there always is an outside chance.

The F.A. Cup is the tournament that has alluded Davis Moyes since he took over as manager. It has not graced the doors of Goodison Park since 1995. Before the draw (see the entire draw, courtesy of the BBC, listed below) Everton's players have been beating their chests saying this was the year we were going all the way. Well someone seems to have pissed off the football gods, and now they need a bloody miracle to get past the fourth round.

FA Cup fourth round draw:

Liverpool v Everton
Manchester United v Tottenham
Hull or Newcastle v Millwall or Crewe
Sunderland v Blyth or Blackburn
Hartlepool v West Ham
Leyton Orient or Sheffield United v Charlton or Norwich
Cardiff v Arsenal
Portsmouth or Bristol City v Histon or Swansea
Chelsea or Southend v Ipswich
Cheltenham or Doncaster v Aston Villa
West Brom or Peterborough v QPR or Burnley
Torquay v Coventry
Kettering v Fulham
Watford v Leicester or Crystal Palace
Derby v Nottingham Forest
Birmingham or Wolves v Middlesbrough

TIHAN runs Poz Cafe

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 00:10:00 +0000

The Tucson Interfaith HIV/AIDS Network (TIVAN) runs a monthly meal program for many people in Tucson who are living with HIV.

Once a month they run Poz Café at St. Francis in the Foothills to give the opportunity for the HIV+ persons to receive a respite from their normal routine and have an opportunity to gather in a social network atmosphere. Since todays medicines for AIDS helps people live longer there is an opportunity at these gatherings to share information within the group of various treatments and medication, and to also give them a chance to play a little e bingo and participate in a raffle where they can win grocery cards, blankets and the like.

TIVAN collaborates with other similar organizations in town such as COPE and SAFE to provide rides for the various out lying people who are in group homes or their own houses. All services are donated each month by sponsors from various interfaith communities in Tucson who purchase the food, plates and center pieces.

They regularly serve over 100 people at a time and have for over ten years. In November they had a record number of 162 participate in the monthly meal.

For more information on how you might be able to help go to their web site at www.tihan.org.

The Horror

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 13:17:00 +0000

I had the opportunity to ride the SunTran bus last week. Over the last few months I have been carpooling with a couple of the salesmen from our office that also live in Oro Valley. As part of my training program for the upcoming half marathon run in December I run from my office to my wife's office, three miles, after work (I get off an hour before she does) and then ride home with her. It just happened that one day last week I was feeling a little under the weather so I chose to walk down to the bus stop at Swan and Broadway and travel down Swan to Glenn. Louisa's office is just 5 minute walk from there.
I had heard in the newspaper about all the"new" bus riders that had taken to the streets due to the economic hard times we are experiencing, especially with rising gas prices and stagnant wages so I was on the lookout for the freshly coiffured office worker, the pinstriped suit types with a briefcase on their lap. The last time I rode the bus with any type of regularity was over a decade ago when my family was down to one car for a while and my wife at the time taught in Three Points. Guess who got the car; a no-brainer!
I was distressed to find a familiarity in my fellow passengers this time around. No new riders just the same people who where there all those years go. The mini skirted, tattooed high schoolers with a lit cigarette dangling from their hand, the Mexican laborers in paint stained pants, the elderly and infirm, the wheelchair bound disabled, overweight welfare types, the toothless and down trodden, the urine drenched stinky men hats pulled down over their eyes, the hospital janitors in blue scrubs, the immigrants and idiots. Still all here. Small wonder the more highly appointed personages don't ride the bus. Like me they'd probably rather walk than to have mix with these dregs of Tucson society. God bless them all, they are who they are, dragging their tired behinds home from work or school. They too make up the American society in which we live but cast a wary eye over because, well, they're different from you and I!

Breaking News: Everton are Buzzing tonight!

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 23:14:00 +0000

Tonight I was chatting on the IM's on Facebook with reserve team player Kieran Agard and asked him if the mood was up beat or was Davey kicking some arse and in the venacular we all use to abbreviate in texting he replied "yeah ders a real buzz around da place so who nose".
Apparently our blues are prepared for the Red Shite. I have been slagging Moyse off to any one who would listen since the debacle against Rovers, even saying I would not even follow the derby game on the BBC site, but who am I kidding. I'm with them sing or swim! Go Toffees kick some Red Shite arse!

Frailties of the Human Body

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 09:15:00 +0000

I don't sleep anymore (its 2:15 am as I write this), at least not without the aid of sleeping aids like Celestial Sleepytime tea or a mild sleeping tablet. Once you get over fifty your body reminds you of the frailties of life, most of which you keep to yourself lest others find you less than perfect.

My hair is falling out. I have male pattern baldness. Now having shaved my head on a couple of occasions I know I have an ugly bald head. Life just seems to be so unfair. Why was I subject to the gene pool that dictated I go bald instead of maintaining my beautiful flowing thick red locks?

I have a cyst on my forehead. A lump the size of a pea to me but according to my doctor is not even worth examining. Every spring I have an out break of psoriasis across the bridge of my nose and eyelids (and strangely enough the back of my knees!) requiring special creams. Certain teeth ache more than others suggesting future problems. Having already received five crowns and an under the gum teeth scraping over the last couple of years that is something I'll put off a little longer.

I have developed a snapping scapula on my right shoulder that causes my shoulder blades to be further apart than the average persons and aches constantly just from daily use. Because of it my neck muscles are constantly bunched to compensate for the lack of power in the right shoulder. It prohibits a fool range of motion in the joint, I can't turn my head, do push ups or lift weights with behind the head movement.

I managed to develop a hernia, right under the sternum. It makes the extra weight that I'm battling (down 20 pounds since the first of the year) extend further as I have no muscle wall to hide it behind. Again the doctor pronounces it is inoperable, just strengthen the muscle. However it prohibits me from sit ups or crunches as that just pushed the hernia out further like some alien being attempting to disembowel me from inside out. My personal trainer has me doing lots of exercises where I suck the belly button into my backbone and I swim often.

Over the last couple of years I have developed some type of prostate problem. It is enlarged slightly; I know because I monitor how I pee. It gets me up at night and sometimes it is a steady flow other times barely a dribble. So I know that at some point I'm going to have a problem. Other than that it works just fine and I keep telling the wife she better take advantage while its available. I have had constipation problems since I was a young lad, and now monitor the bran content in my diet regularly. Having had hemorrhoid problems on and off over the years this is a must.

My back and legs ache when I run. I'm sure the extra weight contributes to the knee pain but it's a catch twenty two. You got to move to lose the flab so what do you do but move, take Aleve and try to forget the frailties. I hike often and am always getting blackened toe nails that take forever to peel off and grow back. Skin flaps have developed on my inner thighs and rub off and bleed when I walk, run or hike unless I use Vaseline and long shorts! I have to use special scrubs to ward off the little imperfections that grow on my sides and arms, and to keep the bottom of my feet from cracking.

For those of you that read this and have yet to discover the age of fifty enjoy life while you are younger because as you get older it takes a lot more out of your physical body to still enjoy the wonderful things you do and take for granted as a young person. Even those of us that are relatively fit at the half century mark find out the physical limitations that our human bodies impose, whether we like it or not.

C+ to Everton's start to the EPL season

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Sun, 21 Sep 2008 21:13:00 +0000

Normally a team on growth spurt as Everton were supposed to be, to gain on their top five finish from last season, the team most qualified to break into the top four Liverpool, Manchester United, Aresnal and Chelsea, is expected to win at least their first couple of home games. Take advantage of playing on their own d so when we lost the opener 2-3 to Blackburn and two weeks later let Portsmouth walk all over us 0-3 things don't look like things were going to be easy. Tying with our Belgium UEFA competition Standard Liege 2-2 at Goodison Park just added to the pressure to do better than we did in the same cup competition last year. Moyes will have an ulcer this season mark my words.
Losing our new exciting Danish right back for 2-3 months due to an injury he picked up on international duty before he had a chance to even play a game didn't help. We are still stuck with the staid unimaginative play of our hard-working captain Phil Neville.
We were to have an easy start to the season, all three of the recently promoted teams in the first five weeks. They all pinned us to the wall. We beat WBA 2-1, escaped after coming from behind at Stoke 3-2 and again came back from a two goal deficit to tie Hull 2-2. Facing Liverpool, who are hot with a capital H right now next week could not be a crueler fate.
Lescott is suffering from poor self esteem and getting beat my everyone in the world and if Yobo put both hands up in the air to show he isn't tugging someones shirt then I will have to consider it a surrender. We need to get tough and hit them hard. On the positive side Castillo looks like a tough guy, and creative enough to have scored already thought the jury is out on Fellaini. How can such a tall guy get beat on a high ball from a corner? He needs to get stuck in. Thank goodness Tiny Tim is back and scoring, the Yak is hitting the old onion bag on a regular basis and my favorite player, Leon Osman, is back healthy and giving it 110% every minute of every game. A C+ to the squad for the first month of the season, but hey at least ManUre are below us in points. I'll take the positives anywhere I can get them today.
I'll be back in a month to issue the next grade. Up and coming are not just the derby game at Liverpool but home games against Newcastle and Man U and Arsenal away.. not to mention the second leg against Standard Liege (and, if we get past them, the next rounds game two days before Manchester United come calling) and a chance to reek revenge on the season's first loss against Blackburn as we face the Rovers away next Wednesday in the first game of the Carling Cup; six games in for weeks. Lets see how badly our decimated squad want it.

Albert and the Lion

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 20:11:00 +0000

As a child my mother would repeat this wonderful poem that Stanley Holloway had recited on the radio. It has stuck with all these years and I even used it in a speech class in college on one occasion. Apparently it was written by a Marriott Edgar.

There's a famous seaside place called Blackpool,

That's noted for fresh-air and fun,

And Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom

Went there with young Albert, their son.

A grand little lad was their Albert

All dressed in his best; quite a swell

'E'd a stick with an 'orse's 'ead 'andle

The finest that Woolworth's could sell.

They didn't think much to the ocean

The waves, they was fiddlin' and small

There was no wrecks... nobody drownded

'Fact, nothing to laugh at, at all.

So, seeking for further amusement

They paid and went into the zoo

Where they'd lions and tigers and cam-els

And old ale and sandwiches too.

There were one great big lion called Wallace

His nose were all covered with scars

He lay in a som-no-lent posture

With the side of his face to the bars.

Now Albert had heard about lions

How they were ferocious and wild

And to see Wallace lying so peaceful

Well... it didn't seem right to the child.

So straight 'way the brave little feller

Not showing a morsel of fear

Took 'is stick with the'orse's 'ead 'andle

And pushed it in Wallace's ear!

You could see that the lion didn't like it

For giving a kind of a roll

He pulled Albert inside the cage with 'im

And swallowed the little lad... whole!

Then Pa, who had seen the occurrence

And didn't know what to do next

Said, "Mother! Yon lions 'et Albert"

And Mother said "Eeh, I am vexed!"

So Mr and Mrs Ramsbottom

Quite rightly, when all's said and done

Complained to the Animal Keeper

That the lion had eaten their son.

The keeper was quite nice about it

He said, "What a nasty mishap

Are you sure that it's your lad he's eaten?"

Pa said, "Am I sure? There's his cap!"

So the manager had to be sent for

He came and he said, "What's to do?"

Pa said, "Yon lion's 'eaten our Albert

And 'im in his Sunday clothes, too."

Then Mother said, "Right's right, young feller

I think it's a shame and a sin

For a lion to go and eat Albert

And after we've paid to come in!"

The manager wanted no trouble

He took out his purse right away

And said, "How much to settle the matter?"

And Pa said "What do you usually pay?"

But Mother had turned a bit awkward

When she thought where her Albert had gone

She said, "No! someone's got to be summonsed"

So that were decided upon.

Round they went to the Police Station

In front of a Magistrate chap

They told 'im what happened to Albert

And proved it by showing his cap.

The Magistrate gave his o-pinion

That no-one was really to blame

He said that he hoped the Ramsbottoms

Would have further sons to their name.

At that Mother got proper blazing

"And thank you, sir, kindly," said she

"What waste all our lives raising children

To feed ruddy lions? Not me!"

Dave Matthews Sucks

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 20:38:00 +0000

Well here is my opportunity to whinge a little.
This past weekend, after buying tickets eight months ago to surprise my wife for out fifth wedding anniversary, we took off for what turned out to be a wonderful weekend, resting up and recouping at the Millenium Resort http://www.millenniumhotels.com/millenniumscottsdale/index.html in Scottsdale ( Phoenix suburb). After kicking back and doing bugger all Friday night and all day Saturday we went to the Dave Matthews Band in concert at Cricket Pavilion. Now that is an outside arena and it was 108 degrees all day so we had anticipated being hot so we where dressed appropriately.
Now let me say out right I am not a Dave Matthews fan at all so I was not expecting to be impressed at all and let it be said it was exactly as I expected. Dave mumbled and shuffled through his songs without allowing any of the words be known. I had never heard any of the songs before so I just sat there miserably while thousands of gyrating scantily clad bodies moved around me. They must have listened to the albums as they seemed to be familiar with the songs. To be fair my wife, who loved DM had never heard these songs either. He must have saved the more well known one(s) (are there any?) until the second half of the concert after we had left. I just want to know why I pay $70.00 for a seat and then everyone stands obliterating my view of the band for the most part so that if I had wanted to be interested I could not be. I stood and took a few pirated pics with the cell phone as the light show they put on was quite spectacular. The musicians he has in the band are all very talented and when jamming, and not playing any particular portion of DM's music were really good. Perhaps Dave should, like many of his predeccesors, stick to writing music for others to play as he evidently has a talent; just is not the best performer for his own music. I rate him as nothing more than a good cover band. Hey he actually did two songs I loved. Talking Heads Burning Down The House and Money by Pink Floyd. The words were crisp and clear and he sounded great. When he went back to his own undecipherable mumbling we left.

Here are some pics to enjoy from my cell:

The Beauty of Sabino Canyon

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 20:28:00 +0000

There is one place, just a short seven and half miles top to bottom, that Tucsonians take visiting friends and relatives, Sabino Canyon. Whether by foot or by tram (for the non-hikers) it is absolutely one of the most beautiful places in Tucson.
Here a few photographs I have taken with friends and family as we enjoy the beauty of not just the main tarmac trail but the side trail of Phoneline and Blacketts Ridge. Enjoy, and take away a new perspective of the hot arid desert of Tucson. Click on each photo for a closer view.

Tucson: Its a dry heat

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 19:54:00 +0000

For those of you that have ever heard this phrase uttered I thought it might be interesting to show you that even here is the Sonoran desert we do have a summer period of monsoon where heavy clouds gather in the skies (as they appear here over Pusch Ridge) and lightening flashes across the sky like a private fireworks show where after a period of dry heaving like a drunk staggering from a local tavern a sudden deluge of raindrops floods the land like vomit pouring forth, uncontrollably.

Because the land is so arid and dry 90% of the time the ground is unable to soak in this sudden offering of life from the skies and so instead of feasting on the flood it is swept away leaving the astonishing appearance of dry ground again just hours later as if nothing had happened if it were not for the unearthed trees and saguaro's lying on their sides, dead and abandoned.

Tusconians are unused such humidity, our streets and homes were not designed for such a heavy down pour and so we look on in bemusement each year wondering how to navigate the flooded streets (the best bet is wait twenty minutes it will all be gone!). It is, after all, not just a dry heat.

Reality Bites

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Sat, 09 Aug 2008 21:54:00 +0000

PSV Eindhoven, probably the toughest competition of the pre-season, being the 2007 Dutch champions dropped in on Goodison for a warm up and we gave them one.
Although they scored first, Amranat, with Baines all over him, managed to scoop one in on an unsighted Howard, Mikel Arteta finished the job with minutes to go calmly slotting home from the penalty spot to even the score. We where unlucky not to have scored early on several occasions with Yak going close twice and a trio of youngsters all getting a shot in, Dan Gosling, Lukas Jutkiewicz and Jack Rodwell.
The youngsters better show up fast as there is a good chance that even if we manage to sign the handful of names we keep hearing are coming (I don't want to jinx anyone by mentioning names; it's too disappointing when it doesn't come to fruition) most of them will play something of a hand during the first two or three weeks. Luckily we have several newly promoted teams in the first few weeks so the schedule is a little lighter than it might have been if we had been unlucky enough to get the Big 4 first.
Jagielka, now that he has more confidence in his role in defense is proving to be a strong utility man (a role he failed miserably in last season) and he may have to step into the defensive midfield role as surely young Rodman is not ready to take over the spot just yet, especially as Phil Neville will be the main man at right full back while Tony Hibbert continues to recover from surgery.
One unusual happening was the introduction of midfielder James Wallace. The young Irishman has not been part of the senior workouts this season. Moyes is really going young this year.

Everton In America

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 18:20:00 +0000

Just a brief recap of the pre-season training sessions we have had in America. We lost our initial game to Chicago Fire 2-1 and then shows some mettle by coming from a tied second half to score in the dying minutes to beat the Colorado Rapids 1-2. It would be Leon Osman to score that last moment scrappy goal, after all, count the games he has done something similar. He plays ball to the wall from the moment he is on the pitch until the final whistle blows. Just exactly the type of scrappy player we need in midfield.
Talking of scrappy, Vaughn must have been feeling his oats getting a red card, and drawing the managers ire, in his first game back. His injuries seem to be well behind him and lets hope he can stay health to inject a little spunky attitude in our frontline this season.
Turner seems to be the definate second choice at keeper but did not play here at all. If we dont sign another 'keeper soon he may get a game early in the season as the USA has a World Cup qualifying game toward the end of August should Howard be called up to play (probable).
We blooded a few youngsters on the trip young Jose Baxter was a very pleasant surprise. With him being only 16 though I assume Moyes will "protect" like he did Rooney and he won't see too many outings in the first team unless it is in the League Cup perhaps. Gosling has done well, and could deputize at full back if we get the squad stretched too thin and Rodwell had a decent run out too.
Joey needs more work, looking very tired from his ordeal after the Nigerian games, and Baines, subject to transfer rumour during the week, is still making it back from injury. Arteta looks to be back and as long as he stays fit he will be once again be out midfield general. The two England team mates at center back Jagielka and Lescott played every minute and looked strong.
I share the managers frustrations at not having new signings join before the team left for the States as they will not be at the same fitness level as the rest of the squad when they finally do sign up and may need to wait while younger fitter players play ahead of them. We are still the only team in the Premier to not sign a new player yet. Lets hope it's not too late as we will not be penetrating the top four with our current squad of only fifteen first team squad players.

No More Deaths: No Más Muertes

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Sun, 03 Aug 2008 18:34:00 +0000

I have read about this organization for some time. While like most Americans I believe that illegal aliens should not be allowed to enter our country over the border from Mexico I also feel greatly for the people. They are, for the most part, attempting to better their lives, earn money to send home to their families and to get here they have to endure terrible treatment from the smugglers and from the weather. We are seeing temperatures way up in the 100's and most of these people are ill prepared for the desert crossing. No More Deaths puts out water jugs at strategic places to offer these travelers life, because no water in the desert equals death. They have suffered, why make them suffer more. Catch them and deport them? Sure but we don't have to aid their demise.
Please check out their web site http://www.nomoredeaths.org/. Here from their site is a brief mission statement in their aid for human rights, something that as the Olympic games take place in China this month we should be more aware of.

No More Deaths is an organization whose mission is to end death and suffering on the U.S./Mexico border through civil initiative: the conviction that people of conscience must work openly and in community to uphold fundamental human rights. Our work embraces the Faith-Based Principles for Immigration Reform and focuses on the following themes:

• Direct aid that extends the right to provide humanitarian assistance
• Witnessing and responding
• Consciousness raising
• Global movement building
• Encouraging humane immigration policy.

The reason I am writing about this is the recent arrest of Dan Millis, a 29 year old volunteer on charges bought by the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Services for littering. Millis was leaving plastic bottles filled with water along desert trails to offer humanitarian aid to illegals crossing our border, and was picking up trash that others had left previously. According to No More Deaths website U.S. Fish and Wildlife law enforcement officers Kirkpatrick and Kozma seized twenty-two gallons of drinking water that had been placed on trails for migrants in need, along with eight gallons from Millis' vehicle. The officers also chastised Mr. Millis and the volunteers with him for cleaning up five crates worth of trash left behind by migrants in the desert.
Just two days earlier Mr. Millis and a group from No More Deaths encountered the remains of Josseline Jamileth Hernandez Quinteros, a fourteen year-old girl from El Salvador who had died trying to cross near the Tumacacori mountains. 128 known deaths have occured on the border so far this year.
Millis now faces six months in jail and $5,000.00. This is a total outrage. To further the outrage
"After two hours of testimony, Federal Magistrate Bernado Velasco decided to not issue a ruling before a packed courthouse on Friday, July 25..."
If you would like to share your opinion please contact Honorable Bernardo P. Velasco
United States District Court Evo A. DeConcini U.S. Courthouse 405 West Congress, Room 5133
Tucson, Arizona 85701 520-205-4630 and I encourage you to contact Senator McCain on his web site at mailto:%20info@johnmccain.com?Subject=Question%20From%20Contact%20Page

407 West Congress Street Suite 103
Tucson, AZ 85701
Main: 520-670-6334 Fax: 520-670-6637

That the charges are even being discussed are ridiculous and we need to let those that are in charge know how we feel as Arizonians and/or U S Citizens.

Injuries, Own Goals and Youthful Exuberience

markpsadler@gmail.com (People ask...) — Fri, 25 Jul 2008 21:12:00 +0000

(I will not be doing a match blow by blow durin the regular season, I will probably just do a monthly wrap, but I am so concerned with the lack of in-coming transfers, the inability to keep good players, our walking wounded, during pre-season that until the full season is set into motion I am monitoring the teams well being. To the point of having to write this blog in our local library as my much maligned fight with Earthlink still leaves me internetless for another five days. You, my reader are worth the effort however, so I could not let you down).

After the display at Preston mid-week, and with some of our African contingent on the bench ready to get a taste you would think that again, even our reserves would make an impression deep upon the newly promoted Nottingham Forest. Again we fell short, the Forest keeper Paul Smith kept our youngsters, Jutkiewicz and Agard, at bay. Once the recent hard working van der Meyde limped off with an apparent thigh strain about fifteen minutes in we never looked like being able to get past the man of the hour, Paul Smith. He frustrated Agard, Roswell and Gosling time and time again. Perhaps it was youth and inexperience that stopped the final ball in the back of the net, at least until van der Meyde's deputy, sixteen year old Jose Baxter, popped up in the sixty-fifth minute to cancel out David Moyes' favourite professional's own goal, Valente having turned in to his own net past Turner on an attempted clearance. The introduction of Yak and Pienaar with ten minutes left did nothing to create any additional chances and we ended in a 1-1 tie.

Shades of yesteryear show up as van der Meyde can't catch a break, year after year always injured early on, and other anxious moments again with Arteta limping off too. Surely they will stay home and heal and not make the trip to America, and let Yak and Peanuts take it too the States instead. We still have a war room of walking wounded with Osman, Vaughn, Hibbert and Cahill still struggling for fitness, let alone match fitness. If anymore go down during preseason we may as well start our U-18 team. At least they have been winning!